Like any girl in love, I know that there are times to be a good girlfriend and times to be myself (an asshole). I try to maintain a healthy balance in order to avoid being too nice or being too big a jerk because either can result in disaster; the former will make Nick suspicious that I want something while the latter could go beyond him thinking my attitude problem is cute and make him break up with me and/or kill me. There is a happy medium, and it is called “adequately nice.” What do I mean? I should think it is obvious, but I will explain.
Being too nice to people after having established that you are, as in my case, kind of an asshole, can hurt them. How? In Nick’s case, he is also an asshole, so he knows that if I am being a touch too sweet for too long and for seemingly no reason, I want something that will probably cost him effort and/or money. In the case of other people, it could encourage false hope in their hearts that you have changed and are becoming a nice person. This is worse than making Nick think I want something. Don’t do that. In the first place, I almost always do want something, so I’m not creating a false belief; in the second place, you probably aren’t going to change so why are you toying with people’s emotions? (There’s being an asshole and there’s being a douchebag, douchebag!) Continue reading